Pants. It’s all pants.

Being a lady over a certain size, sometimes you are faced with the problem of having to buy stuff because it fits rather than being what you wanted or even stylish. You panic in a shop because you want something new and it fits. you know??

Knickers… A very important thing. A decent pair will set you up for the day.. I like just a boring, standard, black, multi pack, low rise, high leg. Comfortable and boring. Everyday pants.

Staring at my tatty stash of old pants, thought I would grab some more as I was due to wander round asda later in the day (yeah, I am so classy, however I have been stuck at home recently so going out anywhere with clothes set my retail head ablaze).

When I got there, I went to the shelves and the ONLY set in my size were some ‘full briefs’.

Ah, I thought, what could be that different??

Right, got home opened the pack, pulled out the pretty looking, delicate black and white pattern (yeah, get me branching out).

As I opened them to the full size, I was almost knocked out by the pattern which translated up in size to something akin to battleship shock camouflage… I tried them on… Pulling up and up and up until I thought I may get to cover my nose.

FULL BRIEFS!! NOOO!  PARACHUTES DUDES, PARACHUTES!!! WITH LEG HOLES SO SMALL THEY ARE GUARANTEED TO CUT YOUR CIRCULATION OFF!!!

So, the lesson for today… Have patience in the shops. If you are looking for specific activity pants (not just eyebrow wiggling activity you dirty minded people… Some other things deserve specific under garments you know, for me it’s just sitting in my pj’s, it’s quite boring really), do not buy in an urgent manner and do not buy giant knickers just because they are in your size. it does nothing but really upset you.

I could possibly make five jumpers though, and for five quid that’s almost a bargain… Apart from the shock camo effect….

At least I own some Bridget Joneses. About 15 years late for the trend…again…

Oh, second moral of the story… Never throw old stuff away before you get back from the shop.  Happy to report I’m just mooching in my comfy old pants. Why I ever doubted them, I’ll never know.

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