A post taken from my FB 

​Sorry if this is a bit of a rant. It’s taken me a while to formulate how to say it. Still may ramble in places.

Right now the world is a bad place (not saying it wasn’t before, but now feels really bad). Things are going on at home and abroad that are down right vile. I am angry and frightened. The future is not what I ever envisaged.

I don’t know what to do. I’m trying to do everything I can.

I’m getting really annoyed that people are bandying around snowflake and liberal as negative terminology. Since when did being sensitive become a bad thing, that empathising and wanting to take a liberal stance made you weak?

I understand that people will not agree 100% of the time. That’s people. But we need to all be people of the world and stop this current racist bullshit. 

Seriously, look at history.. racism doesn’t work and gets people killed and it’s just rubbish. 

Let’s call out what we can, change what we can, be involved at any level we can. Stand up and be part of the side of right.

I have hope for the future, that it can be less shit for everyone and that we can all be a bit more sensitive to others needs and less about what’s in your personal bubble.
Yeah. All that. Probably more.

Additional: stop treating people like things.

New Year… new me??… nope, I’m still the same.

Well.

Here we are. 2017. At least 2016 is over, right?

Hubby was ill over Xmas, it was a horrible day unfortunately, then I was ill over new year. It’s hit me quite hard and I’m fighting a fibro flare.

Work has actually started to get busy and interesting again. I need to interrupt a critical work situation and go to bloody pain management therapy on Monday. I don’t want to go, I’ve got to go. Gonna cost £30 round trip in a cab. FFS. Talking abut my pain doesn’t get rid of my pain. Mindfulness is great if it works for you. I’m struggling with it.

Anyway, this year I have not set any resolutions. Not for any other reason than I have no idea if I wil be able to see it through so no need to out pressure km myself, right!? There is no new me. I’m the same as 8 days ago. A mess and in pain.

I’m trying to cope with the T2 diabetes thing too, so healthy eating is a must, not a new year fad. I need to lose so much weight it is incomprehensible to me how I am supposed to do it with the lack of support I am getting. I’m trying things on my own, and it’s OK, but I’m not able to push myself as it hurts. 22kilos to go…

The pain takes no heed of the change of calendar. I do try my hardest to crack on despite everything, but there has been such a level of expectation (pressure to get presents sorted, feeding stuff sorted, keep hubby entertained etc.) with the festive break, it’s actually been detrimental to my overall well being. Mad isn’t it? It’s supposed to be a happy time too. Was actually a very lonely day.

I feel like cack. It is hard to keep a lid on things. 

But, and this is the important thing, I will persevere. I have no option. One foot in front of the other.

Sorry this is flat and a bit whingy. It sums me up right now. Give me a week and I’ll get my head straight.

In the mean time… happy New Year. 😊